Full text of the press release issued by Mr Deepak Svengali-Singh, on behalf of his client, Cricket Tragics.
1. Contrary to popular rumour, my client has not been dropped from the Hyde Heath Cricket Club for loss of form, spread betting or the pre-arranged bowling of rank long hops for cash.
2. My client has decided to take a month off from the long, arduous village cricket season in order to spend some time with the soon-to-be Mrs Cricket Tragics.
3. He hopes to return to the team in July, although understands that competition for places is extremely tight, doesn't expect to simply waltz back into the side, you have to earn the right etc...
4. During his time off, my client asks the press to respect his privacy and to understand that there will be no match reports on the Cricket Tragics blog until July.
5. There may be the occasional non-Hyde Heath cricket-related post. My client is currently considering something about two excellent but very different cricket books, We'll Get 'Em in Sequins by Max Davidson and A Last English Summer by Duncan Hamilton.
6. For the thousands of you desperate to hear how the Heath get on each week, my client recommends checking the HHCC match reports page.
7. For those of you wishing to be subjected to a never-ending stream of inane drivel, please follow my client on Twitter.